Bee-lieve it!
by LivingPuppet
Summary: Naruto finds himslef in a long forgotten tunnel under Konoha. And then the Hokage's office. And then the Academy. What's up with all the bees?


Naruto didn't often accidentally stumble into old forgotten temples underneath Konoha, but this was one time that he managed to. It wasn't his first time, he wasn't a virgin to this sort of stuff, it happened on a monthly, if not weekly, basis. Like all other times before, he deemed it interesting to go searching around until the ANBU finds him. Yet again, for the third time that month. It was a very lucky thing that he had learned to carry torches and matches on him after the third time he fell into an unknown (and very, _very_ dark) tunnel.

Lighting the way, and scaring many strange bugs (mostly bees, not that Naruto gave any thought about them) and animals (A couple rats, a gnome, a seven foot three tailed moth,) away from the fire, Naruto pressed forward following a slightly honey scented pathway to… somewhere. He assumed that the scent was taking him to the middle of the temple. The murals depicting some sort of insect that vaguely looked like bees swarming what seemed to be a person signing a scroll had completely slipped his notice.

A well placed rock in front of Naruto had sent him tumbling to the ground. He scraped his hand, causing it to bleed rather badly. The torch rolling away from him, putting the fire out.

"Aw man!" Naruto grumbled to himself. "Now I'm gonna have to use this weird thing…" He continued muttering to himself, pulling a flashlight out of one of his many (endless) pockets. Standing back up, he looked all around him like his head was on a swivel, paying special attention to the ground. It somehow worked, despite not having any sort of energy to power it.

Eventually, hours later, he was closer to the center section of the temple. The light bulb inside the flashlight burned out, leaving him to follow the distinct scent of honey and something else, along with the ever so faint sound of buzzing. He easily made it, with only a few more accidents causing him to reopen his palm several more times.

Stumbling into the center of the temple (quite literally, scraping his hand _yet again_ ), Naruto stared in awe. A massive statue depicting a bumble bee was erected in the very center; a scroll lay upon its head. Well, it was quite large for a bee. It more like a cat-sized statue, and not a very big cat. Like the size of a kitten, to be more exact. But it was big for a bee of its species, and it was made by bees, if what it was made out of gave any indication. Maybe it was a bee shaped beehive?

Naruto grinned brightly and ran straight up to the scroll and happily grabbed it, thinking it was a cool jutsu or something.

"NEEHH?!" His loud and slightly disappointed shriek had alerted the ANBU to his location.

They didn't get to him in time.

* * *

"Naru… to?" The Hokage sweat dropped, looking at the said boy. Naruto smiled sheepishly, dislodging a few bees that had taken to covering him nearly completely.

"Heheh, hey old man. So funny story… I found a contract." Naruto awkwardly informed him, although he hadn't need to, considering his appearance. It was a little obvious by now.

A loud slapping sound was heard all the way to Ichiraku Ramen as the too old Hokage introduced palm to face. "Naruto. Oh my god."

"It was in another one of those underground places that I probably wasn't supposed to find." The nine year old went on to explain, sounding slightly more smarter than usual.

"Naruto. HOLY SHIT."

"Hey Jiji, why aren't you using exclamation points instead of periods? Can't you use the proper punctuation?" Naruto went on naively, not knowing about the fourth wall, or why he could even hear punctuation.

"What the fuu…" one of the hidden ANBU trailed off, wondering what in the world was going on. I mean, sure, the kid was covered head to toe in bees, but considering what the rest of the ninja world was like? That shouldn't even surprise anyone.

"Oh my!" Hiruzen… said? Shouted? Who knows. He's not using the proper punctuation. A small bumble bee buzzed by, buzzing things that only Naruto could understand.

' _Pfffftt!'_ The humble bumble snickered to itself.

* * *

The bees that Naruto accidentally began hosting had actually had a better impact on him that anyone could have thought. He answered more questions in the class room, and the bees managed to get him to change his outfit. He now wore a modified kimono. He even changed up his color scheme. It was predominately black with honey-yellow edging and embroidery.

He had even sewn it himself. Naruto was very proud of himself. The bees had… _insisted_ on clothes that they could easily swarm out of and join the battle. They even _helped_ him with his training. He was much faster and had better aim than before he had the bees.

However, he kept up the simple charade of "Bees? What bees? Bees aren't real! Show me a bee. That's not a bee!" and another of his favourite: "What the fuck is two plus two again?" and other one that he happened to enjoy: "Yeah, I totally have a gender. Now where did I put it again?". In Naruto's opinion, that was the ultimate prank. It wasn't about hurting anybody; it was about confusing the shit out of them.

"Hey Naruto?" Sakura had finally noticed where the subtle, yet noticeable buzzing sound had come from. "Are you… buzzing? Or did someone finally put you on vibrate?"

"Heh, no?" He wearily eyed the broody boy next to him, answering yet ignoring Sakura with a questioning laugh that was definitely not suspicious at all.

Sakura blinked twice, before looking back at the front of the class room. "Okay."

…

And if a bee slowly flew as slow as it could fly right in front of her face, almost in a circle, she said not one word about it.

Actually, she yelled many bad words about it. Very, very bad words about it.

Not about all bee-kind. She only cussed out that one specific bee.

Naruto sweated nervously bee-side her, taking another glance at the slightly less broody boy next to him. He bee-friely wondered if he would bee on his team. Shino, out of everyone in the classroom (read: Village), was the nicest person to him. And if Naruto happened to like the boy more than most, then that was his own personal problem.

Shino sneezed. It must've been the extra pollen that the strange bees brought in.

* * *

This is a sad attempt at humor. If you actually found this funny, I would really appreciate a comment. If you hated it, you may also comment.

Maybe a one shot? Maybe not? Would you like to see more of this? I dunno.

Actually, if you guys could just comment in general, that'd be nice.

(Update!) I went through this a little bit, fixed a few spelling mistakes and added like... two sentences. Maybe three sentences. Does any one want anything specific for the next chapter? I've been wanting to continue writing this, but I don't exactly have any ideas...


End file.
